You know its gonna be a bad day when.......

Well, Ladies and Gents I hope you all had a sparkly and spectacular New Year. I had a great time working at the club on New Year's Eve (even if I was in charge!) got asked for my number - he did ring - to invite me to a party - then never heard from again, shame, seemed like a nice bloke!

I realise from the blurb at the top of this page I have failed to complete one of the major aims of this blog - documenting my bizarre life so here goes for the truly worst week of a New Year!

*30th December 11:30am :Driving home to drop Bex (Jo's New Zealand Housemate) off at our house and notice that my fuel pump decides to have a quick cough and splutter. Think nothing more of it - except thinking how ironic it would be if I were to break down on the one day I venture out of Coventry when I have a show.

12:45pm: On way back now fuel pump decides to be an arse and Moffy (my car) slows to a grinding halt on the hard shoulder of the M42 just past junction 3 in front of load of cones

12:48pm: Police pull up behind me - start to get a feeling of dread somewhere in the pit of my stomach about how well this day is going to go- Start car, they escort me in reversing on the hard shoulder to get a run of speed without hitting the cones. - Ever noticed how conscious of your driving you get when the police are escorting you? :{

1pm : Get past junction 3a and police pull off - breathe huge sigh of relief.

1:10pm: Get onto A45 - Moffy has really had enough now, decide to pull over and ring theatre to tell them in all probability that I'm not going to make it for the half (1:25) even though I'm all of 10mins drive away. (small voice in back of head wonders at the possibility of making it at all - and then decides to concentrate on why my life is ruled by the law according to Sod)

1:15pm: Pull over in a bus stop call the RAC and then me Dad for some advice - he suggests checking the float chamber and then the fuel pump - "oh and by the way the chamber will be full of petrol so don't make a spark". Then commence to unscrew float chamber with a metal screw driver on the metal lid and a big prayer.

1:17pm: Cursing my self for not putting my ski jacket on - it's freezing and shaking hands are not helping with the whole "no sparks" scenario! RAC said they'd be an hour - pointed out I was a woman on me own - they said half an hour so I give them 40 mins!

1:20pm: Petrol in Float chamber and no blockages as far as I can see so must be the fuel pump. Glyn rings to see how its going. Tell him I'll ring at half past if the RAC man isn't there so's I can make it for the show (at 2)

1:30pm: Phone Glyn and plead for assistance - have now got the blanket I sit on and am standing with it wrapped round me. See an RAC van drive in the opposite direction - could be a loong wait!

1:45pm: RAC man comes, says it might be my thermostat - don't believe him but smile and nod trying not to sound like I know what the problem is. Then he thinks water's being sprayed onto the electrics - still hasn't checked the fuel pump...hmmmm...

1:48pm: Glyn arrives. RAC man can't stay if I go so decide to stay and get to the theatre by 2:30 come Hell or high water - this is the point at which I predicted that you could no longer get away with one follow spot - Glyn goes off a little worried and make it back just in time for beginners.

1:57pm: Me and RAC man decide to try and drive to the petrol station down the slip road so he can see what my car is doing and it'll be safer for us.

2:20pm: RAC man does his best and fixes the problem which was...all together now....the FUEL PUMP. One side of the contacts wasn't touching so it wasn't opening an shutting to let fuel through. Decide that he should follow me back to the house then give a lift to the theatre 'cos not sure how well Moffy will be. Get half way to home and decide to make a run for it to the theatre 'cos she seems OK. Wave a fond farewell to the RAC angel in blue overalls and head for the theatre.

2:30pm: Slide into the road next to the theatre and into my reserved space outside stage door, get told by several people not to panic - which, truth be told - I actually wasn't! Saw Alwyn and Emma coming offstage, worked out where we were - ran up the stairs towards my box, popped into the loo - which I started needing somewhere back on the hard shoulder of the M42 - walked into my box aimed the lamp and flicked on - PERFECT TIMING!